Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Coffee addiction

I say I have three cups of coffee a day. But what I mean is I get to three then I stop counting.

Yesterday I didn't have any coffee at all. And I got a raging headache and felt like shit.

Today I also didn't have any coffee, and I got a headache and felt average.

My body is exhausted. My mind is shattered and I am not coping well at all. I have no ability to withstand suggestion. Someone says "let's do this" and I just say "sure" without considering all the factors - travel, time, fatigue.

So I drank coffee to keep going. I was at the point where I couldn't function without it. Mr G and I had to make an emergency stop at a cafe after the funeral.

So I'm stopping with the coffee. I can't gauge how well I feel if I'm dosed up on caffeine all day. It sucks. I'll have even less energy. Work, thesis, food. No friends, no loved ones. I almost cried on a 10 minute walk today. I can't spread my time/energy out anymore.

I give it until the end of November. If I'm not starting to get better by then, I'm taking unpaid leave and moving home. I just can't do this. 

2 comments:

  1. *hugs*

    Having been caffeine free for ten years now I promise it does get better. The initial withdrawal is terrible, but after a while your body will bounce back. You’ll sleep better too. Until then lots of water and fruit/vegetables. Plenty of early nights.

    We’re here if you need us. I’ll even make chicken soup. It’s guaranteed to cure almost all that ails you (might have something to do with the amount of garlic I put in).

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  2. My dearest darling xo

    I totally agree with Hawm, the withdrawal will get easier. Can you maybe cut down, rather than going cold turkey?

    I am reading a book with magic - wait, I'm reading a book normally, there's no magic way to do that. What was I saying? Oh right, the book has characters who can use magic, and I wish I could wiggle my fingers or twitch my nose and fix everything for you.

    Bless you, my dear.

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