Mr G's dad died.
I went home for a night to stay with him. There was no food. He cried, got mad at me, told me how much he loves me then promised me the universe.
I didn't want the universe. I wanted love and attention.
That's really it. Because when you love someone you listen to them. You try to please them.
I don't want money and I don't want surprise gifts (got a pair of shoes). I wanted talking. Lots of talking. I wanted some understanding - I am so tired my bones hurt. I can't think because I'm in a fog and I just want to sleep and read all day.
At the same time, I want to be there for him. I want to help him and hug him when he cries and take care of him. I love him so much, I can't stand seeing him so shattered.
Memorial service is tomorrow.
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